1. I usually have an extensive character profile on the first page of the Q&A thread, with a quick overview of health, willpower and XP (or something like that) in the first post of that thread.
2. It really just depends on the game I'm running. Usually, I update once per week and I expect all Players to have posted by then, but in my upcoming Scion game I aim at updating as often as once every 3 days. It is flexible
3. It is all in my head, which is as reliable for remembering as an apple is for driving. So far, though, some of my games have been flexible enough so that I don't need to write down points as no one really notices when I change the plot. The worst thing about this is remembering all the names, so I'm starting to write some things down.
4. I applaud good posts (and usually the first post in the game) but I hardly ever smite anyone unless his post really needs to be changed. I had two Players whose introposts had to be edited by a modorator. They got smitten for doing it.